The Rabbit Hole

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The Holy Spirit has put it on my aching heart to tell you all about emergent churches.  That will be my topic for tomorrow, but today we shall talk about The Birds, and yes, the Alfred Hitchcock variety.  This week was normal, or as normal gets for me.  Until Friday.  Down with yet another cold, (what fresh hell is this?) I decided to walk in my neighbor’s woods rather than the usual four mile hike at Middlecreek.  The only thing I had kept that was gifted to me by my Reiki Master was a beautiful, carved hiking stick.  Actually, I picked it out of the burn pile, brushed it off and innocently thought, What could a hiking stick do to me? 

If I haven’t mentioned it before, told my spirit animal was a raven, I was mysteriously followed by crows every where I went.  I thought it splendid at the time, wow, they are protecting me…..you know, why else would I be the only gal in the neighborhood with crows nests, screaming birds and near head on collisions with black raptors?  This was exceedingly comforting to me until I realized that God wasn’t sending them.

I pick up the blasted stick and decided that this will be the only remnant of the New Age that I will keep-to be fair, my sensei had given it to me as a gift, and even though I know she did some form of ceremonial caca pooh-pooh over it, I thought:  “Maybe the rain washed it off?  It was out in the burn pile for two weeks, what could POSSIBLY GO WRONG?”  I commenced to my girlfriend’s yard to hunt for deer sheds.  My golden retriever beside me, I got further into the woods.  The birds began to gather.  I have to say I hadn’t heard or seen them in the week and a half since I began this journey-but here they were  again.  Folks, I tell you no lie-we were surrounded.  I dropped said stick and ran, as fast as you can wearing 20 pound clodhoppers in terrain filled with quicksand and briar bushes.  Sweating, I returned to my yard and freedom.

Now, who wants to volunteer to get that monstrosity out of my neighbor’s woods?  Say a prayer for her, ’cause ain’t no way it’s gonna be me.

The Rabbit Hole

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March 23, 2017

Well folks, I promised you research and that is what I have been up to for the past week.  I wish, in a way, that I could unlearn a few things…………..but I believe I was divinely led to what He needed me to know.  I am sick to my stomach, in a state of grief-paranoid to the point that the sight of a man in the grocery store parking lot sent me into a near dead faint.  What did he do?  He was getting in his car, only I didn’t see him at first.  Jesus Christmas, will I ever be the same?

I’ve decided that the only way that I can move forward is by having a strong sense of humor, a satirical view of the New Age Movement, the Illuminati, (the word gives me heart palpitations) and pedophiles in Hollyweird.  My brother, a talented artist who is a household name around these parts (Philadelphia area), has always wondered why he didn’t make it “bigger” in the music business.  After watching a multitude of various artists who are said to be in this secret, satanic society, I am praising God that he didn’t…..it’s all so sad.

I have decided that I know all that I need to at this point.  I am a strong, Irish, Christian woman-but I am very impressionable and let’s face it, the truth shall set you free-but it sure can make you crazy.  Bat shit crazy lives here, no need to stir the hornet’s nest.  And speaking of bees that sting, my in-laws are now even more afraid of me than ever.  Backstory: as a recovering alcoholic it has become clear to me that I scared the bejeepers out of them on a weekly, if not daily basis.  They saw me drive my jeep through our garage door in broad daylight.  I once sat on my windowsill naked, again-broad daylight people-and screamed “I don’t give a fuck what the neighbors think!!!!!!!!!!!”  Well, our neighbors just happen to be my in-laws and they were entertaining people from their church.  Grimace. Yeah, they have reasons to avoid me.

So, although I love them dearly, I can pretty much tell you that the last thing they wanted to hear was my battle with the demon cat who died and came back to life three, count em, three times.  They don’t know that the second time my husband had grabbed the poor thing, who was laying, dead as a doornail, next to our bathroom toilet.  He took him outside to be buried.  I heard a gunshot.  Why?  I asked him.

“Apparently the cat had one more life in him.  I put him out of his misery.”

Exactly.  No stress here.  So they were less than pleased when I cried and told them of the spiritual warfare that had happened up the road, in my very bedroom.  They said not one word.  No one wants to talk about it.  I had to laugh when I saw them hiding behind their truck earlier today.  And as I returned to my kitchen I saw one of them run for the mail box.  Poor Tom and Dolly~

Squirrels Eating Nuts….

1807:031117:20F:BROWN02   :3March 19, 2017

I have to get a hold of myself.  In the days of research for my blog The Rabbit Hole, I took my full-blown, red alert, the sky is falling mind to places I never thought I’d be.  I could tell myself that it was all in the name of investigative reporting-but you can get so sucked into some of the scariest bullshit on the internet.  Is it because I was always afraid of scary movies and I’m trying to make up for it by scaring the life force out of myself?  What the?

I live in my own little world, and anyone who knows me will tell you just that.  I now am well versed in politics (no worries, no politico hereo) for the first time in my adult life, but as for what is going on in the real world?  Jesus, Mary and Joseph have I been living under a crystal?  Smiley face….I crack myself up.  Anyhooser, I had been researching Flakka, a drug that had been imported from China back in 2014 into Florida, and created near hysteria in that state.  Bath salts.  I am always, perpetually the last one in this family to know jack shit.  So, after a week of watching the outbreak in Florida and other locations across the country.  I saw a virtual zombie apocalypse coming and I still tremble at the thought of some of the footage…….Good God!  What fresh hell is this?  So, it’s 11:00 a.m. in the morning and we are getting ready to look at used trucks with our son.  “Sweet mother of merciful Jesus!  Does Bradley know about this?” Holy inappropriate behavior, I immediately message my eldest niece, alerting her to the near epidemic, attaching a disturbing video of people becoming evil incarnate, and tell her, “Honey, if you see a naked man or woman behaving like this, it’s a new drug called Flakka and I want you to get the fuck out of dodge.  Do not show this to your mother or sister.  They will faint.”  Verbatim.  Yup.

While standing in the lot of the dealership, the unsuspecting salesperson who just happened to come out of nowhere….he didn’t know that I was about to scream at him like a freight train was coming right down 422, like a bullet with my name on it.  Oh my God, it still makes me hurt when I think/laugh out loud about it.  Meanwhile, on the way home my husband says to me, “Honey, Flakka was three years ago.  Don’t you remember the bath salts thing?”  Vaguely.  I do know that I had not seen naked, demonic, freaks of nature committing  acts of cannibalism, murder and incredible, mind-blowing strength.  I was convinced Armageddon had begun and I can laugh now, but man, I need to start checking and rechecking the dates.  I came home from church today and immediately went to check the Flakka statistics. Nothing since 2014.  Legal back then and on the rise-China stopped making the drug and dealers stopped dealing it.  I messaged my niece.  “I can’t believe all of these crazy drugs they’re coming up with Aunt Michele….”

What I didn’t say back was, there wasn’t enough weed in this entire town to calm my ass down yesterday.  Pass the Hookah, please……………….

The Rabbit Hole

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March 16, 2017

What, oh what will she be talking about today?  What spiritual beliefs will she bash?  How can she speak with such certainty?  Who the Harry does she think she is?  Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

What is upsetting me on this beautiful Spring day?  You’d be better off asking me what isn’t……When the scales were first taken off of my eyes, Jesus and the Holy Spirit led me to Jeremiah 50:

A Message about Babylon

The Lord gave Jeremiah the prophet this message concerning Babylon and the land of the Babylonians.  This is what the Lord says:

“Tell the whole world,

and keep nothing back.

Raise a signal flag, to tell everyone that Babylon will fall!

Her images and idols will be shattered.

Her gods Bel and Marduk will be utterly disgraced.

For a nation will attack her from the north

and bring such a destruction that no one will live there again.

Everything will be gone;

both people and animals will flee.”

How did the Holy Spirit lead me to this particular verse in the Bible?  Via bible dip, of course.  I began doing bible dips after reading Running With Scissors.  A character in the book did them, she opened the bible after praying.  As luck would have it, she almost always got an answer, even though it may not have made sense at the time.  As the years passed, I was brought great comfort through these dips, and as my mind was reeling from the crap I had been listening to on a daily basis-well, I took these words to heart.

Babylon is used in scripture as a symbol of all evil.  This message can apply to the end times when God will wipe out all evil once and for all.*

That hit me hard.  My mind was officially blown.  The problem at hand?  No one is listening to those of us who are speaking the biblical truth.   Well, some are, but in general?  I am sure that strangers, as well as those near and dear are thinking that I have gone bat shit crazy.  So, maybe I have, but I am crazy in love with a Jesus who wants more than anything to save you from the peril of believing that there is more than ONE WAY to salvation.   And that is EXACTLY what the New Age, Oprah Winfrey, Joel Osteen and millions of other  misinformed individuals want you to believe.  Oprah  said that she turned a new leaf when she “was about 26 years old.  I was sitting in church and I heard the preacher say that God is a jealous God.  Well, I don’t want to believe in a God that is jealous of me.”

READ YOUR SCRIPTURE WOMAN.  God isn’t jealous about you.  He is jealous FOR you.  He doesn’t want us to fall prey to the minions who preach that you can have what you want, there’s no sin here, just buy The Secret and you too can be led to enlightenment-be the God you want to be………….Heresy.  Bullshit.

Why are so many churches putting their heads in the sand?  Why isn’t the real truth being preached?  Because we are living in a world where everyone gets a prize, there’s no such thing as Hell and lukewarm churches want attendance, numbers, money…….no bad news-it doesn’t sell people.  I’ll give you a sneak peak about my next bible dip and you can talk amongst yourselves ’til tomorrow.

Isaiah 65

Judgment and Final Salvation

“I was ready to respond, but no one asked for help.

I was ready to be found, but no one was looking for me.

I said, “Here I am, here I am!” to a nation that did not call on my name.

All day long I opened my arms to a rebellious people.

But they follow their own evil paths, and their own crooked schemes.

 

 

  • Life Application Study Bible

 

 

 

The Rabbit Hole

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Yesterday was a train wreck……of massive proportions.  Still recovering from a cold, I was unable to accomplish much-and the fatigue had its way with my 55 -year old body, that and my nerves.  I was in bed at 4 pm, and after lying around the day of the blizzard, my restless leg syndrome had kept me up all night; I can handle having a broken bone, the flu, PTSD  among a few (cringe) but a bad case of the jimmy legs can send my husband and I into the Insomnia Zone, which makes us bitchy and prone to fighting over blankets, the cats, the fan, and even if we are or are not going to spoon.  Please, I cringed when he touched anywhere beneath my waste.  My husband gives amazing back and body massages. I would have been in heaven if I hadn’t been in hell.

Alas, being awake, I tossed and turned, unable to get a few things off of my mind.  Tomorrow’s blog will concentrate more on scripture and how God led me each step of the way.  But tonight I want to talk about my anger and disappointment at the “professional therapists” out there advising those of us who suffer from mental health issues on how to “heal,” mentally, physically and spiritually.  It boils my blood when I think of not only my Reiki Master, but my therapist’s contribution to a basic near mental health breakdown, all in the name of “growing in truth and spirituality” without first: ensuring that the proper research is done before advising very vulnerable and sensitive people, who are hanging in the balance; in an effort to somehow, after possibly years of unsuccessful therapies, ease their perpetual pain. Yes, I am speaking of myself, but you see where I am going with this.

It frightens me that there are young and older adults alike being harmed by methods or “healings” that have  not been thoroughly investigated.  How would you feel if you or your child were harmed due to the ignorance or research of social workers and reiki masters who are, more times than not, dealing with clients who have searched their entire life for peace.  Mental Illness in its many forms is the most misdiagnosed and misunderstood (especially on the part of the patients ) who have been given conflicting information, even diagnoses in their search for answers to haunting, disturbing questions we tossed about our entire lives.  We need to start being or own advocates and standing up for our rights in this community-or we’ll fall for anything.

I have not only wasted my time over the past year and a half, but I have set my progress on this journey back a peg or two.  I’ll share this little ditty that occurred in my then therapist’s office in January.  I was sitting on the couch and I asked her why she had advised me (strongly suggested) to go back to reiki treatments months before.  I took her advice seriously, and I suppose hindsight is twenty-twenty, but I had assumed she knew enough about PTSD and crippling anxiety to lead me in the right direction.

“Oh, because you said it had helped you before.”

And she will never learn how that advice sent me deeper into the depths of depression, rage and the verge of a mental breakdown.  I will never, ever seek the help of any therapist or spiritual healer again.  All of the rituals, cleansings and fear-fear that I would say something negative and be banished to the Horrible Life Kingdom-looking up the meaning of every stinking bird, bug or animal I came across for almost two years.  MASSIVE waste of time and energy.  All of that mess when Jesus was standing right beside me, with open arms as He always, always had been for me.  He is in charge of my life, period.  No amount of meditating, chakra healing or sage cleansing is going to change that fact-not for one millisecond.

March 14, 2017

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I have decided to blog daily about my experiences in coming out of the New Age and into the loving arms of Jesus Christ.  I knew I would face persecution, but it was pretty hard for me to take yesterday.  My husband and I wanted to enjoy the blizzard, but I had to face some cold hard facts first.  After reading the first in my series entitled The Rabbit Hole. my ex-Reiki practitioner was pissed.  Full on frontal pissed.  She said I had “slandered and abused her name.”  Ok, I didn’t mention any names.  “People know you have come to me before, I have never done any harm to you.”  I didn’t say she did, as a matter of fact, I remember trying to protect her.  Look, I said.  I apologized profusely for hurting her.  Told her she didn’t hold a gun to my head.  Told her I loved her and was worried that charlatans would be taking advantage, more advantage of her……..pled with her to understand.

“If you’re going to throw out the hiking stick I gave you I want it back.”

I told her my husband had just taken the poor, demonic black cat outside….to shoot it.  Turns out that poor thing had more than 3 lives, and it broke my heart, as well as my husband’s to have to kill it.  I had found it yesterday morning, laying next to our toilet in the bathroom.  Bad day indeed.  This person whom I thought loved me?  She got out the big guns.  “Don’t you dare play the victim.  We are responsible for our own healing.”

I felt so badly, I quickly wrote a blog to apologize.  But then I read her words again.

“Our suffering doesn’t make us special.”

Love can build a bridge, but you can’t fix stupid.